Letting God Write My Love Story
By Alisha Renee
Like most teenage girls, I used to daydream about my future husband. I wondered what he’d look like, if I’d passed him on the street, or if he was someone I already knew. I looked forward to the day when my love story would finally begin. Little did I know that ‘Chapter one’ would begin months before I first stared into the eyes of my husband-to-be. It would start with a choice, made alone, at 16.
It was Youth Group night. I’d been told a couple from America was coming to speak about relationships. I wasn’t interested. I already knew that physical intimacy before marriage wasn’t God’s ideal, and I was OK with that. I didn’t need some old couple telling me more ‘Thou shalt nots’. But it wasn’t a decrepit old man and woman who walked into the foyer that night, it was a warm and vibrant couple in their 20’s. I was curious and decided to stay instead of leave. That decision changed my life.
Eric and Leslie Ludy* showed me that God isn’t a faraway taskmaster, demanding we follow the rules; He is a devoted Father who passionately cares about us and our relationships. Our spoken and unspoken desires matter to Him, and He wants to be invited into this deeply vulnerable part of our lives. They acknowledged that we sometimes find it hard to surrender the romantic part of our lives to God because we fear He might choose someone we’re not attracted to, or He might not have anyone for us at all. I resonated with that fear. But that’s not our Father’s nature. God’s heart is for all His sons and daughters to experience the beauty and richness of a marriage built on unconditional love. Not only that, He is a romantic God who writes the best love stories!
Eric and Leslie introduced me to the idea that a lasting love story begins with the choices we make before we meet our future mate. Leslie shared Proverbs 31:12 (NIV), ‘She does him [her husband] good, not harm, all the days of her life.’ After reading this verse, she decided to honour her husband before she even met him. She wanted to save not only her body for him, but her whole heart as well. Eric spoke of how before meeting Leslie, he used to imagine two eyes watching him—the eyes of his future wife—and he chose to conduct himself in a way that, if she could see him, she would feel honored.
This was a whole new way of looking at relationships, and I found myself longing for a godly relationship like Eric and Leslie’s—one where God was intricately involved. I didn’t want to give my heart away to any more guys. It was time to let God into my love story. So, at 16 years old, I surrendered this area of my life to God, completely, and I made a commitment to to honour my future husband from that moment forward. At the end of the seminar, I received a flower with a promise, ‘It will be a match made in heaven.’ God had already picked up the pen.
Three months later, I stared into the striking blue eyes of my kiwi mission leader, Andrew. First impressions? I was scared of him! This was one intense human being! But God opened my eyes to see the deeply passionate soul that lay beneath the surface, and I felt compelled to encourage him. We soon became close friends and talked together for hours.
At the end of the trip, Andrew asked if he could give me a kiss on the cheek. I felt so respected to be asked and said yes. The next day, when we said goodbye at the airport, he asked if we could pray together and commit our relationship to God. He was leading us both in an act of surrender, where God was invited to be at the centre of our relationship.
When I went back to school, I told a classmate about my new friend, Andrew. I kid you not, he said, ‘It’s a match made in heaven.’ I was stunned. I also overheard my mum telling her friend about my new ‘special friend.’ To which she responded, ‘It’s a match made in heaven.’ This was no small coincidence; this was the handprint of my heavenly Father.
For my 17th birthday, delivered to my Aussie home all the way from New Zealand, I received a huge brown teddy bear and 17 red roses. I had told no one about the secret desire of my heart to have someone give me teddies and roses. But God knew. I had also told no one that I wanted to marry someone with an accent! And to this Australian girl, the kiwi accent was pretty cute! God blew me away with how much he cared about the little details.
Throughout our budding relationship, even after we were engaged, our guidepost was to always conduct ourselves in a way that would honour our future spouse. This tethered physical desire to a safe waiting place and kept our focus on friendship. The first kiss Andrew and I shared was on our wedding day, and 22 years later he is still my best friend.
I wish I had space to share more of our story, but I simply want you to know that, Girl, God cares about you and your love story. I’m not more special than anyone else; I simply trusted my heavenly Father to lead my heart, and I surrendered this area of my life to Him. I never thought anyone could truly love me or see beauty in me, yet God surprised me by leading me to a young man who helped me to see myself the way He does. And don’t for one minute think that past mistakes exclude you from a beautiful love story. God’s got plenty of grace to wrap you in, and He is waiting to weave His goodness into your love story.
PROMPT: Andrew and I chose to wear a purity ring as a symbol of choosing to honour God and our future spouse in the season of waiting. If surrendering this area of your life to God is something you feel led to do, think about what you might do as a symbol of your surrender and trust.
PRAYER: Father, I invite you into my love story. You know my hopes, my dreams, and my fears. I offer You my trust. I will trust You to lead my heart, and I will trust in Your timing. Help me to make wise choices and to love You first, above all other loves.
This story features in My Fatih Journey—Our Father’s Masterpiece.
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
*For teaching and resources by Eric and Leslie Ludy, see www.ellerslie.com.
