Redefining Beauty
By Alisha Renee
When I was in high school, I hated looking in the mirror. No matter which way I turned, there was no escaping my freckles or my high waist—the two things I hated most about my appearance. I couldn’t do much about my high waist, but I could fix the freckle situation. Oh, how I longed for pure, flawless skin!
Since no amount of wishing would remove the freckles from my face, I tried the next best thing—make-up. I fell in love with foundation! It was my saviour. I mastered the art of delicately balancing the right amount of make-up; just enough to hide my bothersome freckles, but not so much that the teachers would notice and make a big deal about it.
Covered up freckles gave me confidence. That is, until the day a popular Year 10 boy popped my belief bubble when he blurted out, ‘Why do you wear so much make-up? You look so much better without it.’
His words shocked me. Was he blind? Had he not seen my freckles? Clearly he had, and he believed I looked better when they were revealed, not covered up. This boy’s words were a mirror revealing a flaw—not in my appearance, but in my belief about true beauty. To me, at the time, flawless skin = beauty. His words showed me that the equation was wrong. Maths was never my strong point.
So, if a flawless complexion isn’t beauty, what is? 1 Peter 3:3,4 (NIV) helped me redefine what ‘beautiful’ is. It says:
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.
This verse isn’t talking about a gentle and quiet personality, but a gentle and quiet spirit. This is someone who is connected to the Father; who is at rest in Him. No striving. It is a woman who has found her identity in God and in who He says she is.
I wanted this kind of beauty.
At the time, there was a girl in Year 12 who I thought was absolutely beautiful. I wanted to be like her. She wasn’t pretty in the way society defines it. The beauty of her spirit is what captivated me. She literally beamed! Her smile, her joy, her warmth, her encouragement, her leadership, and her gentleness all drew people to her. She was someone who was comfortable in her own skin, and others felt comfortable being around her. She showed me what a gentle and quiet spirit looked like, and I liked what I saw.
Looking around at older women has also helped me to redefine beauty. Nobody escapes ageing. Let’s face it, we’re all going to get wrinkles, our hair is going to turn grey, and we’re all going to get saggy bits. I could be wrong, but I don’t think there are any ‘hot babes’ in nursing homes! Physical beauty fades, but nothing can take away the twinkle in an old woman’s eye who has spent her lifetime investing in beauty that lasts; that of her inner self—her character. When I’m old (and no, I’m not old yet!) I want this beauty to be seen in me.
I’ve met a lot of people, and I can honestly say that the most beautiful women I’ve met are not the prettiest; they are those who have learned how to love well and how to be OK with who they are and what they look like.
We don’t have much control over our physical appearance, but we have total control over the kind of person we are becoming. With the help of my Father, it is my prayer that my life will reflect His beauty, His kindness, His compassion and His love. He is the source of my smile, and ‘I’ve never seen a smiling face that was not beautiful.’
PROMPT: Read 1 Peter 3:3,4 again. What do you sense the Holy Spirit is saying to you?
PRAYER: Father, I’m sorry for the time I have wasted thinking that I’m not beautiful. I am beautiful to You. Redefine my understanding of beauty. Help me cultivate a gentle and quiet spirit that finds rest in who You say I am. Help me to see in myself what You see in me.
